I used to believe that I wasn’t enough.
I thought I had to work harder than everyone around me to get people to like me. Clients would often ask, “YOU felt like you weren’t enough?” The honest answer is, “Yes. I struggled with knowing I was enough.” And now, having worked with thousands of people, I see this as a common core belief that we take on as children.
As a child, you judged yourself against role models you could not fairly compare yourself to — your parents, your older siblings, supermodels, or comic book superheroes. And you may have believed hurtful things others said to you. The joke is that most EVERYONE does this, even the people you compare yourself to, and most everyone feels that they aren’t enough.
Through this process, you adopt identities which are always limiting beliefs of who you truly are.
Life has its way with you and relentlessly challenges your identities. You can either grow or shrink, depending upon whether you meet these challenges with love or fear. If you think your worthiness depends on your body or your looks, life may challenge you with aging, illness, or other body image issues.
You are not your bank accounts. You are not your jobs. You are not your roles as employee, boss, mother, wife, husband, father, daughter or son.
Identities come and go as you move through life. Ultimately, your essence moves you in alignment beyond any bullshit story you might have of yourself. I thought I was a daughter, a wife, a mom, a project manager, and a bazillion other titles. The more I did my work, the more I realized that those were experiences and roles that I played, they weren’t my true essence.
Your true essence is LOVE!
Your true essence is love, and that can be expressed in multiple ways through your life. You are pure love and pure light, and you always have been.
Everyone’s life has highs and lows as you move into accepting your life as it is, life’s challenges will stop feeling like attacks. They’ll just be things that happen to you that you can learn from. All of your experiences offer blessings, although often hidden, and come with a reminder that you are lovable and valuable … exactly as you are.
What if you let go of the story that you are not enough? This is a world of insanity, and there will still be laundry that isn’t done and people around you who are unhappy. Can you accept what is and stop using stories of “should be” or “not enough” to be unhappy?
Your childhood belief that you are not enough was never true. The truth is you are enough. The truth is you are love. Whether you know it or not, you are love! Love is your essence.
Let’s do a little challenge. This can help you figure out where you are on your journey to feeling your “enough-ness.”
I AM ENOUGH Challenge:
- Feel into the words, “I am enough.”
- Notice any contraction this thought evokes in your body.
- Meet any tightness in your body with compassion, acceptance and understanding, just as you would bring love to a child.
- Relax your shoulders, breathe deeply, and remember, you are enough just as you are. You always have been.