Rita Henry
Rita is an Intuitive Counselor who works with bright sensitive people who are sick of struggling in their relationships and want to make the pain go away. Though her in-person and online intimate healing retreats and one-on-one sessions, she has helped thousands of people quiet the noise, move forward, and make peace with their past and their present, so that they can heal, be happier, and live a life they love.

I found myself breathless when I first read what later became one of my favorite lessons in A Course in Miracles:

🍁 “To give and to receive are one, in truth.” 

Why? Because I believed I needed to work harder and give more than anyone else just to be worthy.

My belief fell short as I explored “giving and receiving are one, in truth.” That meant I was out of balance.

Shit! 💩 I WAS out of balance. I would go, go, go, giving until it hurt and then give some more, AND THEN — I’d crash and burn, only to resurrect and start all over again. Since I was ignorantly focusing on giving, I was out of balance. But I didn’t know. And I didn’t know that I didn’t know. 😇

Receiving is just as important as giving — this blew my mind! It includes everything from the smallest compliment or hug to the bliss of receiving expansive, succulent joy bombs like the giggle of a toddler or the adoring gaze of a lover. This also includes receiving life-altering, in-the-best-way-possible transformative gifts of growth that live on the other side of torment, anguish and pain. Remember, with the gift of pain, you get to keep the lesson and ultimately let go of the struggle.

Some people feel more comfortable in the role of receiver. They cling to the perception that giving isn’t safe because others may reject or find no value in what they offer. 

I relished the position of giving, but I had the hardest time receiving. I felt more comfortable in the role of the giver. When others gave to me, I often felt either awkward or indebted to them. I eventually came to realize that I was clinging to the false story that in giving, I was in control. I cringed at not being able to control what others would give me. In time, I came to understand how giving and receiving are one, in truth.

🙃 Many of us grew up with the old adage, “It’s better to give than to receive,” as if that’s a nobler way to live.

We’re often taught that honoring others’ needs over our own makes us a better or kinder person, and that receiving is selfish. We’re brought up to feel guilty about receiving. That kind of conditioning leads to shame and a lack of self-worth.

We also may have grown up in a household where receiving came with strings attached. For example, we only received accolades from our parents if we did great in sports, music, got good grades, or achieved something significant. 🏆 We came to believe that who we are simply wasn’t enough.

When we allow ourselves to receive, even if it’s just a compliment, we’re allowing intimacy with our own feelings.

By fully taking in that compliment, gift, or simple act of kindness, we create a connection within ourselves. In fact, letting ourselves receive a gift graciously and authentically is actually a gift to the giver. Think about how much better it feels when someone fully receives your gift or compliment. For me, realizing that living fully requires a balance of giving and receiving was a relief.

Being too controlling on either side of giving or receiving can knock you out of balance.

Giving and receiving are the same thing when we approach them with an open heart.

💛 When I open my heart and give from a place of love, I receive love.
When I open my heart and receive from a place of love, I am giving love.

Let’s practice the power of giving and receiving, as it will offer you uplifting results.

  1. As you go through your day, offer peace to everyone, and notice how you feel peaceful. “I offer you peace and I receive the peace I am giving you now.”
  2. Pause and feel into your offering of peace. The longer you focus on and feel into sharing this heartfelt peace with another, the more you will be filled with peace yourself.

This practice demonstrates the power of cause and effect. The more love you put into your world, the more you will feel loved and be inspired by love. It’s just the way the universe works.

When we open to the balance of giving and receiving, we open to all the abundance the world offers and invite others to do the same.

 

 

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