Love It All? Why Bother?

Apr 19, 2017 | Forgiveness

From birth on we are moved to change. Change is not something to be feared, it is to be experienced. Where would we be without change? Dead.

If we are changing mentally, emotionally or physically, it means that we are alive. Transformation is life. Acceptance of your transformation lends peace to your journey. There is no need to resist that which is present to transform you. If you are in Love, good. If you are in pain, good. Allowing all of it to transform you requires living a surrendered life.

The opposite of living a surrendered life was demonstrated for me growing up. In our household, dad controlled others with his anger and rage, and we attempted to control dad by walking on eggshells, hiding things from him or doing whatever we thought it would take, so he wouldn’t get angry. It didn’t work; he still got angry. Controlling others or being controlled is not authentic living and it was hell to grow up in. The lesson we never tumbled to was that by controlling others we were controlled. We were all controlled by fear.

Dad’s fears lead him to reject the people closest to him—so he wouldn’t risk them rejecting him first. Dad’s walls were high and disconnect ruled his world. Dad found peace in his experience of Alzheimer’s as he forgot his past, he forgot to be combative and angry. As a witness to his experience of Alzheimer’s, it seemed to be a painful way to find peace.

Forgiveness offers us the same gift of peace without the trauma of brain decay. Forgiveness clears held pain and struggle, and that can transform our lives in the best possible way. Do you want to do some Spring cleaning? Make a list of why you are angry at others, and yourself. Then forgive them, and yourself. If you are struggling, please know you don’t have to do this work alone.

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Rita is an Intuitive Counselor who works with bright sensitive people who are sick of struggling in their relationships and want to make the pain go away. Though her in-person and online intimate healing retreats and one-on-one sessions, she has helped thousands of people quiet the noise, move forward, and make peace with their past and their present, so that they can heal, be happier, and live a life they love.

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